Thursday, November 19, 2009

Do I need to repeat myself?

How many times did I say that this week?

I've been paying a lot of attention to my words lately. Psalm 19:14 says "Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in your sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer." I also read a great post here and added to my list Ephesians 4:29 "Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear."

Some of the questions that have come to mind as a result are:

How often do I try and communicate with someone in the other room?
Ask a question while looking in the other direction?
Apologize to someone without even facing him/her?
Carry on conversations in my own mind?
Bring up a hot topic conversation at the wrong time?
Choose words that I know will hurt the other person?
Talk more than I need to?

I have been guilty of all of these not just this week, but sadly more often then I care to count.

Some examples:
I’m trying to teach my 4 yo to listen to others.
Me: Sweetie, you just interrupted me.
4 yo: MOM, that’s because I was still talking!
Me- thinking to myself- well, he never stops!

Me: I’m telling my son something I think is very important.
Son: MOM, can you please be quiet because I’m trying to think!

Now shift gears- two conversations this week with hubby, right before going to bed.
Hubby- where do we stand on our finances? Did we pay that bill? How much do we have left?
Me: what? I’m falling asleep. Can we talk about this when I’m coherent?

So the next day we reviewed the bedtime guidelines- especially the rule- NO talking finances while in bed trying to sleep! (Well, we don’t have any bedtime guidelines, but if we did this rule would be right up there!)

NEXT night while lying in bed trying to sleep
Hubby: One thing we need to get together for taxes this year are those Home Depot receipts. Do you know where they are?
Me: What? Didn’t we just agree NO talking finances?
Hubby: Yeah, but this is tax related.
Me: Ok, no talking finances or TAXES while lying in bed.

Now, I had a few of those timely conversations with him too. He calls and lets me know he's leaving work to come home and I decide this is the best time to unload the "do you know what happened today?" or "guess what our son did?" Now I don't have time to give him a full story but just enough to raise his blood pressure all the ride home. How helpful!

I’ve also noticed how much time I waste rehearsing, thinking and retelling scenarios in my mind. I play out whole conversations thinking I can predict how the other person will respond.

It's no wonder the Bible tells us to "take every thought captive" 2 Cor. 10:5. So, first we must equip ourselves with God's word and meditate on it. Then we must guard our hearts and minds on what we think and say. And, finally, be intentional about saying things that will build up and give grace.

What better way to head into Thanksgiving than by building others up, saying encouraging words, and giving thanks!

Check out Company Girl Coffee over at Rachel Anne's Home Sanctuary. Have a great weekend!


  1. Well, I got a little sidetracked by following your link over to, what a great site! Thanks for sharing it.

    Oh how I can relate to your examples today!! I'm guilty of all those talking infractions: picking bad times to bring up certain subjects, interrupting, rehearsing the conversations....have you been listening to me?

    But I'm determined to do just what you have encouraged us to do: build up other, say encouraging words and give thanks! Wonderful.

  2. What a wonderful post! Such great wisdom here...Have a wonderful weekend!

  3. have described me to a tee! Especially when it relates to my 9 year old who likes to retell every moment of the latest T.V. episode or commercial. I cannot tell you how many times he has talked, walked away and I have realized I had NO CLUE what he had just told me! It is a constant battle with me. thanks for the encouragement!

    Have a great Thanksgiving!

  4. Guilty here too! Great post! Certainly needed those verses and your words of encouragement today! Thanks!
    Have a great weekend!